The Unraveling of Helena Day
by WithinALifetime
Summary: Where the naive girl discovers Jasper Hale might not just be all good-looks and southern charm, that the darkest of monsters are also the most beautiful, and even worse- sometimes love kills. [Jasper/OC]
1. Prologue

Prologue

My fascination with the mystical begun at the young and impressionable age of seven, one book gifted by an Aunt and suddenly I was hooked. Wrapped in blankets, flashlight in hand, I would read and then reread stories about the creatures that dwelled in fairytale and legend.

Life grew to revolve around the phases of begging my parents for more and the endless hours spent absorbing the tales. As I spent nearly all my time between schoolwork, practicing violin, and the stories of the mystical I grew sharp but I also fell behind.

Somewhere along the days spent obsessed with worlds that did not exist, friend begun to leave me. Eyes that once met mine with smiles and pleasantries turned to curious and sometimes shamelessly judgmental eyes. By the time I realized it was already too let. I was ahead of my grade, but with an absent mind, a creatively wonderful combination for a social disaster.

The days came where my friends no longer enjoyed making the treks into the woods to hunt for fairies or join me for days of tea parties and dress up in my parent's garden. They moved on, some might say they grew up- that I was the one stuck in the childish phase of wonder- but personally I prefer to simply saw they grew up differently.

Soon it was boys and makeup, all about wearing the right clothes and making the right friends. I didn't care, my outfits did not change from the eccentricities and my eyes never quite fit too my face, still too big and round.

I became the girl with her violin as a friend. I was not bullied, not directly anyway, not when everyone in Fork knew everyone.

I tried to not be bothered by isolation, because I figured it would be a curse to fail into the mundane standards of life everyone had seemed so easily to embrace. I figured at some point something mystical had to jump out from the pages of my books and take me away on some wonderful journey. I waited for my spectacular.

What I had not known was how deceptive appearances could be. Fairytales were of bad and good- their beauty was captivating and their monsters horrifying. But sometimes, the most terrifying of monster could also be the most beautiful.

The Cullens were my spectacular.

Lonely eyes sought out the unusual, found interest in how obvious the Cullens were in the abnormalities and their beauty. They were hauntingly beautiful and reserved like Ancient Greek statues that had sprung to live and escaped from the museum to attend High School.

But they were too good to be true, too amazing to look at me twice, not even once could I have imagined their eyes to find my own. Somehow they did, somehow our fates feel together and I ended up in their wonder confused of how I had gotten so fortunate.

But life with the Cullens did not come without a price; by the time I realized… it was already too late.

* * *

A/N- Hello! Thank you for reading this far! This story, revamped (no pun intended) to follow a new story line. As I stated in the earliest drafts of this story, this will no be a verbatim retelling of Twilight save for a character insert, what would be the point of that? No fun. So there will be some changes, the storyline will be a bit darker, and some of the flaws I personally saw in the storyline will be changed or left out.


	2. Chapter 1

The night before my first day of my first day of High School, and it rains.

It wasn't unusual or even unexpected. Forks seemed to be in a constant state of dreary. This fact has rarely disturbed my sleep; often even acting like a soft lullaby guiding me into slumber.

Last night it felt like torture.

And consequentially the morning followed the same pattern, waking up before my alarm clock but felt as if I never fell asleep to begin with. Stumbling out of bed, my body unaccustomed to the early wakeup, my bones beg for me to go back to bed and sleep to ten like I had been all summer.

Instead I force myself up and dress into the carefully laid out outfit, something I had accomplished during the sleepless night. It isn't too polished, a simple lose cotton fabric shirt and jeans that hung just barely enough onto my figure to give a slight outline.

Attending to morning routine with a slow pace, the slightest of panicked urgency underlying it, but the extra time from my early waking relaxed my schedule and I left me dressed, finished eating, and with my lunch and bag prepped and ready to go five minutes before the designated leaving times.

Standing in front of one of the living room mirrors, I search my reflection. Do I look older from eighth grade? I hope so. I finally gave into the temptation of adding mascara and a thin line of black line of eyeliner above my blue eyes, trying a few techniques to make them not seem so giant, but leave my freckled uncovered, my pale skin radiating in the grim and rainy lighting. My blonde hair sat flat on my shoulders and I ponder on the idea of braiding it back, the rain doesn't seem to be stopping anytime soon and the idea of it ending up a frizzy nest seemed less than desirable.

"Of course you're already ready." My head snapped away from the mirror, taking a small step back embarrassed by being caught staring at my reflection, not like my sister even gave it a second glance.

My eyes trail over Luann, two years my senior and entering in her Junior year, it leaves her in the position to treat me as if she is somehow an aged and wise veteran of this awful thing called High School. Using it to torment me the last few months there was little I could do but endure, often black mailing me into following her every whim with each mention of the fact she will be driving me to school.

"Of course you aren't." I respond, drifting away from her figure as she moves to make her own lunch. Though I wouldn't call it "making" she mostly throws together different prepackaged foods until she seems content and tosses it into her shoulder bag.

"Freshman." She says with a roll of her eyes, strutting pass me to the door, picking up her umbrella and car keys along the way.

I narrow my eyes at her and shake my head. "What does that even mean?" I whisper before trudging behind her.

"Don't leave yet!" The panicked voice of my mother emerges down the hallway followed by the echoing of running footsteps. My sister and I exchange glances and annoyed groans, as if we believed we could make it free without the necessary first day photo-shoot.

* * *

One of the many things that had kept me up was the prospect of having to trail behind Lulu and her friends- the ultimate defeat. I hardly even expected Lulu to allowed such even if I had found myself hopelessly lost, but luckily I find peace in walking on my own through the halls before class.

A benefit to having little friends, no one waiting for you before school and plenty of free time to test out routes. Last year had been easy, the majority of my class close by, now with a more advanced schedule everything was scattered around the unfamiliar school. Sure I had been passing by the building my entire life, and even attending events inside, but this was different.

I took the alone time to listen to music, a soft jazz guiding my step; I located most of my classes by the time the bell rang and suddenly the stress of getting lost doesn't seem so bad.

It was then, with a small grin to my face, walking down the hall with a carefree step that someone, or what felt like multiple eyes, were staring at me.

I stopped in my tracks, caught off guard- usually everyone found a reason to not look at me- and here I was with five pairs of eyes on me. Looking up I was met with the inhumanely beautiful figures of the Cullen family. Blood rises to my cheeks when I realize all of their attentions are directed to me.

Since they moved here a year ago I have heard all about them, or at least how little was known about them, the handsome doctor and his stunning wife who adopted all the captivating, well-behaved teenagers that kept to themselves. But this is the first time I have seen their beauty for my own eyes, and they are all staring at me.

Quickly they seem to realize my awareness of their attention blatantly directed towards me and they all at once seem to shift their glances, all except for the topaz eyes of one boy in particular. His hair was a honey blonde and his face as handsome as the rest if it was not for the pained expression on his face, and it was slowly growing darker and angrier the longer I stared.

My heart begun to swell, disappointment and fear quickly depriving me of my earlier cheer. It did not take a genius to understand that there was a certain aggravation in his stare, annoyance even, and my heart squeezed something unusual. All of them seemed to share a bit of that fire, the blonde beauty by the near giant looked ready to snap my neck. Even the small, pixie like, girl who seemed so light had a strange look to her.

Unable to take it any longer, I turned on my heels and walked as quickly as I could imagine away from the scene. It did not matter how much I tried to smile, to feel comfortable, something would always be there to snap me back into reality.

I'll never fit in anywhere.

I accept the dramatic thought and continue onto my class, trying to pretend that heat was not rising in my face and beginning to water at my eyes. I quickly tried to forget the glare, attempting to not overthink it.

But I couldn't, it felt impossible to forget those ways those two eyes in particular seemed to look at me with such livid despise. It burned in my chest and made me feel strangely inadequate, wondering what I possibly could have done wrong.

* * *

The terrible sensation my strange encounter with the Cullens faded almost surprisingly quickly, though even then the lasting impression of shame still lingered, but with the presence of an entire new set of teachers at hand it was much easier to keep distracted. I was hardly ashamed to say I was a bit of a fan of school. Things were going fine, or at least normal, until I arrived in my Algebra Two class. The pressure of feeling small and young in a class of Sophmores and Juniors was already intimidating enough until _he_ showed up.

The bell was about to ring and the teacher about to stand and start class, when a figure entered the room.

Quickly and with surprising grace, the bronze haired member of the Cullen family had sat in the seat over from me. I could not help but stare, only looking away after a quick glance on his part reminded me I was doing so to begin with. My heart seemed to skip a few beats, he was one of the less aggressive of the Cullen family with their strange and angry glares, but he undoubtably had stared at me like I had grown two heads and that seemed to hurt just as much.

After a quick attendance I put a name to to the male Cullen, Edward. As quickly as I picked up on it though I was trying to forget I had, ignoring further when he seemed to glance slightly in my direction when my own name was called.

Trying to focus on the teacher standing and introducing the class syllabus and rules I begun to realize how terribly I was doing so. The image of all the Cullen and their stares was playing over and over in my head and my hands seemed clammy being so close to one of them. They were nearly perfect and they all seemed to hate me for no reasons. Had they simply heard it around town? You think they'd understand how wrong and judgmental small town gossip could be…

Class had ended early and the majority of students fell to comfortable conversation, nearly everyone having at least one friend in the class, naturally I spent the time staring at the wall and contemplating how many stares I would get if I pulled out one of my books. I would, if it was not for the intimidating presence of one of the Cullen family members next to me.

As soon as I had thought it though he seemed to be moving, up to go have a discussion with the teacher at the desk; I paused for a second but after realizing his discussion was a basic question and little to be suspicious about, I pulled out the ratty library copy of _Alice in Wonderland_ from my backpack. It was not my fairytales or mythology, but it was mystical all the same, and probably one of my favorite novels. I had hoped it would bring me some comfort on the first day.

Wrapped up in the pages, I only remerged to reality when the bell rang, by the time it had I only had a glance to see that Edward had returned to his seat before he was moving out the door. My insides tingled and I hoped I had no more classes with any of the Cullens, unsure if I would be able to handle any more awkward tension for the rest of the day and happy that at least I had lunch to have a small break before the last two classes.

It did not take to the next classes for me to have my next encounter with the Cullen family. Moving to a table with two girls talking, figuring sitting on the opposite end that it would be easy enough to blend in without disturbing them, I was stopped when the shortest of the Cullen family came to cross my path. Her hair, chopped short and dark, seemed to make her sparkle in this wonderful light that reminded me of some of the drawings of fairies I saw in my books. It made me grin at her without even realizing, or maybe it was simply the fact the expression she met me with was so pleasant.

"Hello Helena, I hope you have a nice first day." The girl said, lunch plate in hand before she seem to pivot away and strut with a light dance to her step to the table where her family sat glaring- this time not at me. I watched her as she went, face twisted in confusion, wondering what had happened to so drastically change her attitude towards me. Had it been a mistake, did she really not hate me as was now trying to make up for it after seeing how obviously I was upset about it?

Turning away from them, I hide a grin, whether I wanted to admit it or not, it did make me feel better.

Only when I reached the table of the two whispering girls, who only extended a short weary glance at me before returning to their hushed conversation, did I realize what felt off. The blonde boy had been gone, his entire family was there but him.

It couldn't have been me, it made no sense. None of it did, but surely he was not absent from lunch because of me, impossible, so why did I feel so guilty?

* * *

A/N- This first part has a few mini parts to it and is less detailed I think, but considering it is more of an introduction it will get more entertaining hopefully. Anyway thanks for reading, feedback is extremely appreciated, and have a nice day!

Also side note, Helena is a freshman in the beginning of this story, but her freshman year is going to be passing very quickly, her sophomore year is the mean focus which is when the whole Bella storyline will take place


	3. Chapter 2

A/N- Thank you so much to the Guest and TheAmazingMaya who reviewed I really appreciated it along with everyone who added this story as a favorite/alert! I'm really into writing this story but feel a bit unsure of myself and any helpful criticism or reviews would be very encouraging!

* * *

Chapter Two

It was raining, unsurprisingly, when I made the passage from algebra two to the library. The class was just as awkward as the day before, though after Alice's kind introduction it was a bit less painful of an experience; but with a lack of appetite and a bit of reluctance to spend another day alone at the lunch table, I decided on spending lunch in the library. The copy of Grimm's Fairytales was tucked between my arm and side as I entered the room, the smell of worn books and the tick of the clock a warm and welcoming escape from the white walls and staring eyes of the cafeteria.

Giving a smile to the librarian, I moved to sit in one of the side desks hidden away by walls of books, I put my backpack onto the chair besides me and pulled out my book. When I read, it didn't even matter if I was alone, because for the moments I folded myself into other worlds it felt like I wasn't.

I was content with the set-up, with the silence of the library save the occasional mummer from students entering in and out and the sound of the rain pattering against the building, until I heard the door open one time in particular. Something seemed to seize me, a flood of emotions that were warm and inviting had me sitting straighter and glancing behind me to see the new edition to the room. Almost immediately I was turning back, flushed, because approaching behind me was the golden eyes Cullen who looked at me yesterday like I had killed his mother.

Nerve tickled at my throat as he moved around me before approaching on the other side of the table, as I stared up at him the anxiety seemed to melt away, and all I could do was stare blankly up at his sharp features. He no longer look livid, though possibly still a bit in pain, but now there was a gentle look to his face. His eyes even seemed lighter.

"Do you mind if I sit here?" He asked in a smooth southern drawl, snapping me from my dazed stare, my cheeks reddened and I nodded fervently. Slowly he seemed to sit down, almost too slow, before he was sat opposite me. My hands fumbled with my book, wondering if he was planning on continuing any of the nastiness from the day before. This all seemed too strange.

He was the first to speak again, unsurprising consider my current inability to speak. "What's your name?" My lips that had been hanging open quickly shut and I swallowed harshly, but even as the anxiety seemed to flood my veins it seemed to be at the same time dissipated. It was strange, but I could not question it too much- it had been the only thing keeping me from fainting right there on spot.

"Helena," I said quietly, my fingers wrapping around each other on my lap and he smiled warmly. Before I could stop myself, I was speaking again, "You're a Cullen." I said, unsure if it was a question or a statement.

He didn't seem bothered by it, his golden eyes almost staring at me with curiosity, causing my cheeks to only flourish with more heat as I tried to maintain my dignity. "Yes, well Hale technically- Jasper Hale- but yes the Cullens are my foster parents." He said it with such ease, in his smooth and lovely accent. I stared at him, locked in amazement; I had not expected the southern undertones. Possibly I had heard it somewhere along the other rumors, but with all that traveled around about the family whether or not Jasper Hale had a lovely southern accent somehow didn't stick. Not that I understood why, it was amazing.

"What are you reading?" Pulled from reality once more, the awe in my chest seemed to calm down as I moved to speak once more and this time with a tad bit more articulation.

"Grimm's fairytales." I said, unable to stop the grin that spread onto my face, it was rare someone actually asked. Quickly I reminded myself it was only because he probably did not know, had not heard that this sort of thing was all I ever did, it was probably the only reason why he was sitting here in the first place.

As soon as the self-dread was there though, it was gone. A small line fell to my face and my eyebrows furrowed as Jasper took a glance at my book. Everything was there and then it seemed to be slipping away from me, it was growingly uncomfortable and I hated being unable to understand it.

"Do you like fairytales?" Jasper asked after a quick examination, his eyes almost seeming to glow with double meaning.

I blinked, confused, but nodded quickly and reprimanded myself for over-analyzing. "Yes." I must have been terrible conversation.

Jasper was about to talk, when suddenly his eyes caught something behind me, and as I glanced over my shoulder to look I could already hear him getting up to leave Moving to look back at him I only had time to see the apologetic smile on his face as he started walking away. "My apologies, I have to go." He seemed to fumble over, a strange thing to hear on someone who seemed so otherwise graceful.

I nodded, head spinning, and watched as he quickly strode from the library. Once he left my emotions seemed to reel back in and left me utterly and completely dazed.

Was I dreaming?

* * *

The door to my sister's car was smacked close as soon as I was opening it. Eyes wide I spun to face the person responsible to be grace with Lu standing, one hand on hip and the other leaning against the car, looking at me like her eyes were about to burst from her head. My eyes shifted back and forth as if I had missed something, wondering what had her all worked up.

"You talked to a Cullen, an older one no less?" She whispered in a hushed tone. I flushed red and looked to my toes. Lu groans and pulls me almost violently closer. "Is it true?" I didn't want to look up, ashamed and not even sure why. "I'm so proud of my baby sister!" My head jerked up to her response in shock. She wasn't mad?

"How did you even find out?" I said, too loud and had a few head turned in my direction, which was quickly remedied by the immediate lowering of my voice. "Why does it matter anyway?"

"Jill was in the library for English," Lu waved it off, removing her hand from the door and allowing me the opportunity to reopen it. She moved fast, entering the car from the driver's seat and staring at me with narrowed eyes. "And it does matter because for the whole year the Cullen family has been here they've managed to avoid the entire school, yet not even a week through her first week and my little sister is having Jasper Hale introducing himself? What the hell happened?"

I sighed and ducked my head away from her gaze, my eyes finding the silver Volvo across the parking lot. The blonde, supermodel one was glaring at me. I decided to instead look to my feet. I guessed that not all of them had moved on from the strange tension of the first day.

"I don't know, it was hardly a conversation. Just small talk." I told her, trying to switch the subject.

Lu let out an annoyed groan before starting her car. "Fine, don't tell your big sis about it, leave her out of your awesome inquisition of the Cullen family." I rolled my eyes and folded my arms, and pretended in my head that just the conversation alone hadn't restarted the loud drumming in my chest, deciding to also leave out the part where they had also looked at me like I had two head before the first day had even begun.

"I don't even know all their names." I commented some point along in the drive, a quiet whisper. It was not that I wished to continue the conversation, but some part of me, the same that buried itself into books of beautiful creatures, was as mystified with what had happened and the mysterious Cullen family as those fairytales. I wanted to know more.

Lu glanced over with a wide grin, nearly swerving onto the curb while doing so. "Well as you know Jasper Hale is the one you've apparently interested," I rolled my eyes and ducked my head away from her as to hide the blush that spread on my face. I could not let myself believe this, it would only leave me disappointed. "The supermodel is his twin Rosalie Hale and then her bear of a boyfriend is Emmett. The small looking girl is Alice and then the brunette boy is Edward and they are all beautiful. Even their dad is super hot." I scoffed and rolled my eyes but Lu pressed further, "I'm not joking! Not to be weird but he's a real life Dr. Dreamy."

I was glad for the movement away from me and towards the topic of attractive doctors, giggles filling the car as my sister contemplating if donating some blood at the hospital would be enough to warrant getting a glance of the Doctor.

* * *

The next day, Jasper Hale was gone, any amount of joy I might have had in hope of possibly coming to the library again or any other saving grace had quickly disappeared. His absence continued for a week, and though I told myself I had no idea what could have possibly caused it the way Rosalie seemed to catch my eye with a nasty glance made my heart shrivel in insecurity.

As soon as something fun, though admittedly confusing, had happened, it was gone.

The only bit of success over the remainder of the next week was the day I stumbled, well nearly fell into, the small and frightened looking Bonnie. I had a faint idea of her, knew her face well enough but never talked to her until that day. We soon started a pattern switching on and off from sitting in the library and in the cafeteria at lunch, most of the time in either comfortable silence or small talk. I even realized she had a few classes with me. It was nice having a friend, it helped to try and keep my head grounded and looking away from the beautiful statues sat on the opposite side of the cafeteria.

Eventually Jasper Hale did return, and when he did I almost wish he had continued his little missing in action trip because all it brought me was severe disappointment and self-chastising of why I even thought any different, let alone hope that maybe he'd say hello after our meeting in the library even if he really had no reason to and someone as beautiful as him should not be wasting his time with the big-eyed freak of Forks.

Things became what I expected them to, and less of what I dreamt they would be, and I could not complain because at least now I had a familiar and kind face to sit with and all my grades were doing well so really what was the trouble? Why did still nearly a month after the first two bizarre days, did I still have that hallow sort of feeling in the bottom of my chest?

Then my sister broke her arm. Turns out she got her wish of seeing the stunning Dr. Cullen.

It was a strange even to start changing things, coming almost nearing Christmas break and therefor the end of the first semester, but it turns out that when you have a broken arm that you can't drive your sister and yourself to school.

Waving goodbye to Bonnie after seventh period, I waited in the designated area near the front of the school where Lu and I usually waited for Mom to pick us up. Fingers pattering against my legs I waited, as the majority of the school begun filtering out and the parking lot grew increasingly vacant with still no sign of either my sister of my parents.

Pulling my phone from my pockets I sent a quick text message to both my mother and sister.

My sister sent me a response almost immediately.

 _I went home with Sarah._

Heart skipping a bit and a flash of anger flooding my bones, I realized what must have happened and suddenly wanted to not just get home but go to Sarah's home and start screaming at my sister.

My mom's response came soon after.

 _I am at Port Angeles; didn't you get a ride home with your sister's friend?_

The fervent anger I felt in my chest kept me responding to either of them, at that point I didn't even want to have my sister force her friend to come pick me up, I was too angry at all of them. With a huff, I started down the sidewalk and towards the side of the street. I would walk home I decided, even if the walk was about two miles away, it seemed smarter than waiting any longer.

My anger's fire was quickly defeated when the first raindrop splashed against my face, and then the second… I stopped where I stood and looked up to the sky with pleading eyes. I couldn't be mad really- I had lived in Forks my entire life; naturally the day I had to walk home would be the day it rained.

The drizzle quickly thickened to rain and soon to a pour, I was left without and umbrella and my only defense against the weather the hood of my rain jacket. My face still was getting the worse of it with the way the wind splashed water onto my face.

Splashing along the road I realized tears were swelling in my eyes, cursing both my sister and my mother I continued on the path trying to keep my spirits up until one car in particular got too close and sent a wave of water that nearly knocked me down. That was when the first tears starting coming down, not that you could see them against all the other water.

Groaning I tried to shake off some of the water, but it hardly mattered, the worse part of it was the way it seemed to soak my clothes completely through until they stuck like ice packs against my flesh.

I heard the sound of another passing care and was ready to hide in fear of getting hit again by water, but this time- the car stopped.

"Helena!" I shifted around to glance at the car that had stopped by my side, eyes gaping when I discovered it was a familiar shiny Volvo and inside was the pixie haired Alice. Shocked, I stood like an idiot a few extra seconds before she spoke again. "I hate to leave you out in the rain, please get in!" She said.

This time it seemed to hit me, and I was nearly running around to the passenger side, not even having to open it. The small girl was pushing the door open and begun beckoning me in.

"I'm soaking wet, I feel terrible getting your car wet." I told her; almost afraid to sit down in the same seat the perfect Cullens sat with my rainwater soaked body.

Alice gave me a small smile, "It is fine, sit, and here take this towel." She reached to the backseat to hand me a white towel, as I wrapped it around me it almost felt like heaven. The hot air from the car blew into my face at just the right angle I got almost so caught up in the sudden emergence in warmth that I forgot whose car I was sitting in and the girl sitting across from me.

I turned to face her just as she was pulling away from the side of the road. "Thank you," I managed.

She nodded, a large grin on her face. "You live this way right?" She asked in reference to the street we were driving on. I nodded my head and tried to stop the tremble in my lips. "That car was so rude, hitting you with that water." Alice said.

I blinked; she saw that? That must be why she had stopped. Nodding slowly I watched the road, as we got closer to my house, my heart racing once the shock dissipated.

"I am sorry," Alice said suddenly. Turning my head to her I gave a confused look and tried to speak, but she continued. "I wish I could be your friend. Between you and me, one day we will. Keep it quiet though, okay?" She said with a quick wink.

Staring at her, I wondered if I had really fallen and hit my head on the street back there. "Okay," was all I could manage, and with a quick glance I realized we were approaching my house. "Oh, I live there," I said pointing my finger to the light yellow house in particular.

Alice pulled into the driveway with as much ease and grace as the fashion she walked before shifting towards me and leaving my paused in my movement to leave the car. "Be careful, okay?" She told me with a peculiar look to her face.

Nodding I waited for another moment only to find silence. "Thank you," I said, to both the ride and her strange warning.

She gave a white grin in response, "my pleasure." I moved to hand her back the towel but she shook her head. "Keep it, you could use it." She said and I nodded once more finally make my exit.

"Goodbye," we said before I made my run into the house, noticing the way she did not pull away until I had opened the door.

When I entered the empty house, all that had happened suddenly hit me and I felt freezing. Well maybe that was due to the soaking wet clothes as well. As I hurried upstairs and stripped in the bathroom before emerging myself into the hottest setting of water I could stand, all I could think about was the things Alice had said and wondering how she had come across me and why out of the entire town she was the one to take sympathy and give me a ride home.

Christmas came and went, the New Year was brought in and the leaves slowly starting growing back into their usual state of green lush. My freshman year was steadily making its way to a close, and with each day it seemed to grow more and more often I would catch a member of the Cullen family staring at me.

I figured I was insane at first, because clearly it made no sense why they would still be so interested in my let alone interested in the first place, but the day I caught Jasper looking at me during lunch after Bonnie whispered it to me I realized I was not crazy.

Frustration seemed to swell, considering Alice's words and mentioning of a future friendship and how often in the halls it seemed I would be crossing Jasper's in particulars path. All of it grew aggravating and left me confused, I wanted it to be like a story and start developing into something more than just stolen glances, even if it meant cutting it off completely, rather than simply stuck in the strange stage.

My sister's arm healed and she started driving us to school again, soon my birthday even came with a quiet and comfortable dinner with my family and the pleasant addition of Bonnie. It all felt the same, all normal save the strange tingling I'd get whenever a Cullen caught my glance.

Something was waiting to happen, and I did not know what, not until the school year was coming to a quick close that I would soon be getting my wish.

* * *

A/N- I apologize if this section seemed quick moving, it will not always be like this, but because of things that will later become important she is very young at the beginning of this story and while I wanted to plant the seed beginning from her Freshman year I also don't want to dwell on it too long because hey who doesn't want to get to the good stuff?


	4. Chapter 3

A/N- Apologies for posting this then taking it down! I hadn't realized that if you post more than once for like twenty four hours or whatever it won't move up and wanted to wait, next chapter will be up soon as well though!

* * *

Chapter Three

"You're familiar with this part of the woods, right?" Bonnie's soft voice asked from behind me. Glancing over my shoulder as I continued climbing on top of a particularly lumpy rock I nodded my head, hoping that she did not catch onto my bluff. It wasn't that I enjoyed lying to Bonnie- I was just incredibly embarrassed and unsure if letting on how lost I truly was to her would be the best idea.

"Just finding our way back now." I told her with as much joy to my voice as I could manage to force, fumbling with my phone to once again check if I had any service.

Somewhere in the forest, there was rustling, and I heard Bonnie gasp in reaction. "Lena… please tell me the truth I won't be mad." Guilt burned in my chest and despite a lack of anger I could hear there was fear in her face, even despite the friendly nickname she used.

My movements paused and I could almost feel her realization set in. "I am so sorry," I admitted before shamefully turning towards her.

"It is okay, we just really need to get back before gets dark out." She said with a half-hearted grin.

This all begun earlier today, it was the last day of school and everyone including my sister had fun plans to celebrate the start of Summer. All Bonnie and I had was each other and in an attempt to have fun we found our ways on a short walk through the woods, I'm not sure when we exactly managed to get so turned around that we got this lost- but it was definitely making me doubt my intelligence.

To make the matter worse- the sky was darkening and rain was beginning to weave its way past the filter of branches and leaves. We had brought our umbrellas and were dressed in the appropriate wear but the way the sky was seeming to brew something nasty left me even more unsure as we pushed onward.

"I remember this rock!" Bonnie declared behind me before running up to a rock, trudging in the mud from the ground wet from the rain, and holding onto the thing as if it was her savior.

I laughed and ran to catch up to her, it was an especially odd and almost geometric rock and if my childhood memories were anything it had to mean we were going in the right direction. With that hopeful thought it mind, I seemed to skip my way over.

But as I playfully ran along with Bonnie, relieved we could soon be in the warmth of the indoors and maybe curl up with some hot chocolate and movies, my foot seemed to lodge itself into the mud below and the other went flying.

Along with the sharp gasp of breath as I was thrown to the ground, I could hear a crack, falling into the mud with a violent splat and barely avoiding hitting the back of my head against the rock the first thing I could make sense of afterwards was the terrible pain in my ankle the had gotten stuck in the muck. Letting out a hiss of pain I tried to move but was left unable by the overwhelming pain of my ankle, it seemed to burn and radiate through my entire body as all I could do was move just enough so that I was on my side holding it.

"Helena! Helena are you okay?" Bonnie cried out as she rushed to my aid, crouching down and standing over my body until she was sheltering my from the rain that continued to soak our exposed skin and smack against our rain jackets. Her hands went to my ankle and a worried noise escaped her mouth. "Can you move it?"

As the pain became manageable and I felt capable of thinking properly once more I shook my head before deciding to at least give it a try. First trying to roll my ankle I felt a sharp shooting pain and immediately paused all movement, biting my teeth together and hissing once more as I tried to push away the sensations.

"Helena what are we going to do?" Bonnie said with a worried edge to her voice, her eyes large like a deer's, as she seemed to look back and forth at every bit of me as if trying to decide what to do.

Taking deep breaths I tried to consider our options. "Maybe you can go ahead, send for help?" It sounded like a terrible idea, but as I lay on my side in the middle of a storm lost in the woods it seemed to be the only thing that came to mind.

"That won't be necessary."

Bonnie and I both jerked our heads in shocked, completely unaware that we now had company until the person had spoken. Unsure what I was expecting I figured it would not, and could not possibly be a Cullen. And it wasn't, well not exactly, depending if you considered Jasper Hale a Cullen.

Standing above me, looking with sharp eyes with Jasper standing with what appeared to be hiking gear, vaguely I remember the sunny days the Cullen family would miss due to such activity. But what were the chances that he would show up here by us, and in a crisis?

Stumbling over our words, Bonnie ended up being the first to speak, obviously not too caught up on the logistics of this encounter. "I think she broke her ankle!" She managed, a sigh escaping her mouth at the end of it and creases digging themselves into her olive skin. It was a silly thing, as if us lying on the ground was not incriminating enough, but considering our desperation we were hardly about to start getting caught up trying to impress.

Jasper gave a small smirk, walking forward until he was crouching besides Bonnie, catching both of us by surprise as Bonnie just about tumbled into the ground. I couldn't blame her, even I could not help but stare, and it was as if the pain had somehow become second in importance. "Can you walk?" He said in low voice, water dripping into his honey hair and causing one particularly lovely strand to fall into the white of his skin. He blinked and I realized I was staring, terribly.

Stuttering, I nodded and spoke, "Y-yes." I said before looking away almost ashamed by my incompetence.

But warmth seemed to wash over me, even in the cold of the rain and even as even colder hands found their way to my leg. His fingers while could seem to burn my skin with electricity as they found their way to my left boot. Just barely, and painfully gently, he picked it up and turned it slightly. Crying out in pain, my fingers dug into the ground below me and almost immediately it was put back down.

Jasper had a dark look to his eyes, as if ashamed of causing the pain- though that seemed silly to consider, and looked to Bonnie. "My father is a doctor, I can carry her to where I parked and take you both to the hospital." He said in a calm tone, a comforting sensation seeming to radiate from his voice.

Bonnie nodded, wide-eyed and silent.

Then those golden eyes were looking to me once more. "Would it be okay if I carry you?" it really was more a practicality, if I wanted to get out of here any time soon that was the way, and really what girl would say no to Jasper Hale carrying her?  
And with inhumane ease cold arms wrapped under my knees and on my back, picking me up and pressing me against his chest, instinctively my hand came up to rest on his chest, as if bracing myself against him, but it quickly feel as I reddened. If it was another person, if I was not so shy, I would have wrapped my around his neck for better support; but it did not seem like Jasper had any trouble at all carrying me. Even as we started hiking through the rain and muck he seemed more graceful than I had been on my own before the fall, even helping to guide Bonnie through the rain as she struggled to keep up.

After the first day I saw him and even more following the day I had first spoken to him, I started to realize I was developing an infatuation with Jasper Hale. I did not even want to call it a crush, what grounds did it have? One conversation, some off-handed stares, and the fact he was gorgeous? It was the sort of thing that made me feel crazy and foolish, but I could not help the way I felt myself looking at him even when I hadn't consciously decided of such. Whenever I pictured something like this, I imagined I would be panicked, or just flat out faint. But as I was shielded from the rain from his body looming over me and with a probably broken ankle, getting carried bridal style by him; I didn't feel panicked. It just felt right.

It made me want to scream.

A clearing came into focus in the distance and I could see a fancy and expensive looking car waiting, I figured it must be Jasper's and remember back to the day Alice had given me the ride. What a strange habit to always end up having to get rescued by the Cullen family in the rain and end up getting water and mud all over the car. It probably was not the best of impressions.

"Is that your car?" Bonnie asked as she trotted to keep up, breathless, I almost felt bad- Jasper was a fast walker, and Bonnie had short legs.

Jasper gave her a small upturn of the lips and nodded, walking around to the passenger seat and leaning me against the car as he used one hand to pull the keys from his pocket. Even then as I was held up by the car and his one hand, I could have sworn I barely felt a difference, when the car was unlocked Jasper opened the passenger door and pulled a towel out from it to wrap around me before sitting me down in the seat. I barely had time to register what had happened before he was passing a second one to Bonnie.

She gave him a quiet thank you and cautiously stepped into the backseat, myself still staring at Jasper as if I must be hallucinating. He did not take a second glance as me, moving into the driver's seat and starting the car.

"Do you have service?" He asked, calm and collected. Both Bonnie and I shook our heads, and almost immediately he was reaching into his pocket and handing me a silver phone. "Use mine to call your parents." I barely had time to glance back at Bonnie before I was dialing my mother.

"Hello?" My mother picked up, a bit of confusion in her tone, probably from the random caller.

I took a breath, almost unsure how to explain what happened. "Hi Mom," I started with a strangely shaky voice. I swallowed away the unease and continued, "Bonnie and I were hiking when it started raining, I fell and now I think my ankle might have broke."  
"What? Are you okay? Where are you?" My mother started firing off the questions.

I chuckled lightly and let her finish her questioning before continuing. "It is fine, we found some help and are heading to the hospital." I glanced at my peripheral towards Jasper, but he was looking to the road.

Finishing up the conversation with my mother, I ended the call already hearing in the background her getting ready to head off to the hospital. Handing the phone to Bonnie she called her parents as well and handed the phone back to its owner, who with nimble fingers slipped it back into his pockets. The car fell soon after into silence.

"Thank goodness you found us." Bonnie said from the backseat, her voice unsure.

Jasper did not look away from the road. "It is. I was hiking when I heard your voices. You seemed to be in trouble." He explained with careful words.

The forest street turned to views of Forks and soon the familiar structure of Forks General, it was the place I had been born and my sister before me. Sometimes I dreaded the sameness of it, but sometimes familiarity was not the worse thing, even if it meant sitting alone nearly every year separate from the same people every year.

Jasper pulled into the furthest edge of the parking lot, almost unsure, and with a weary glance I realized something seemed off in his expression. Like pain. I was about to speak, wondering if all of a sudden his chivalry had suddenly cut short, when the car starting moving again. Quicker this time, pulling into the drop of loop in front of the building.

As I stepped out from the car I saw the Jasper Hale so many were familiar with, the pained and reserved expression like something was bothering him but I could not tell what. I wondered if I had done something to offended but had no idea what. He helped me out of the car, moving almost in a blur, before Bonnie joined my side and he was moving away.

"Can you handle this from here?" His voice was deeper, rougher, and his teeth seemed clenched.

I nodded quickly, staring unsure at him but unwilling to make him stay any longer. Jasper paused as if to say something but then was suddenly giving a curt nod in response and heading back into his car before pulling away.

"He seemed strange…" I whispered, the further the car seemed to be the more I began to become more and more cognizant of the growing pain in my ankle.

Bonnie gave a 'humph' before moving to wrap her arms under my shoulder. "Maybe he doesn't like hospitals."

I nodded, that would make sense, though it would be a bit ironic consider his foster parent was a doctor. Hopping into the building with the help of Bonnie, I tried to ignore all thoughts pertaining to the strange turn of events.

* * *

A/N- This chapter shows a bit of development along with a bit of the still "naïve" side to Helena, I still stick to the idea that I want this to be a bit different and more dark but I also want it to get there slowly and start off with her being a bit star-struck.

Also thank you again for those who followed/favorited and to TheAmazingMaya for reviewing again!


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Thunder seemed to ring in my ear and strike outside my window. My body threw itself in desperation for a comfortable position. I needed to sleep, to rest fully and give into the peace of slumber, but my ankle had swollen and bruised and my head was left restless.

 _"You fell on your head you said?"_

Groaning I forced my head into my pillow and tried to drown out the pounding of the storm against the walls of the house. I needed to rest, that was what the doctor had said.

" _Can you look into the light for me?"_

When my mind grew dull enough to slip into sleep, the dream seemed to begin almost immediately. It was back in the doctor's office with my parents and Bonnie besides me. Dr. Cullen stood before me with a light in my eyes to check for a concussion.

 _"I think it is safe to say her head is fine, once I get the x-rays back for her ankle we can give you more information. I'd say she will be just fine though." He was as polite as Jasper, it almost made me mad, why did all of them have to be like this? It was like they were just asking for me to loose my mind._

 _My mother pursed her lips and stared with worry between Bonnie and I, always the worrier. "Thank goodness they got here quickly."_

 _Carlisle nodded, smiling at us. "I would agree."  
"It was almost a miracle Jasper found us." Bonnie said from beside me. I glanced at her, though confused by my reaction. Maybe I did fall on my head wrong. _

_Dr. Cullen did not falter, though seemed to drift away from the subject. "Yes it is."  
"Dr. Cullen's son found you two?" My father asked, I wondered if he was thinking something bad about it. That would be like him. Though I'm unsure how protective father he could get concerning the boy who drove his daughter to the hospital and possibly saved her from withering away in the forest with a broken ankle. _

As soon as I was asleep I was awake again, my hand drifting to my forehead and rubbing at my temples. Everything felt off, more than just the way the cast on my foot felt like someone had slapped a piece of concrete around my ankle as if just to get to watch me walk funny. My mind was thrown in the loop, the image of gold stuck in my head and drifting in the corner of my eyes everywhere I looked.

This affatuation had to end.

Jasper Hale was driving me insane.

"I think Jasper likes you." I nearly choked on the hot chocolate, my hands clenching tighter onto the mug between my hands as I glared at Bonnie. Where would she ever get an idea like that?  
I shook my head, almost violently, before adjusting my leg so as to elevate it further- in hope to keep the swelling down. As far as summer vacations go, this was less of the expectation of fun adventure I had imagined. Sure I loved a good book, but that was stuff that could be done in the Winter. Summer was the time to trail through the woods and visit the beach. Sure I'd take a book with me and spend most of the time day-dreaming, but it was fun and sometimes even turn my skin from pale to less pale. This was just sad.

"Why is that so crazy?" Bonnie asked, chuckling at my reaction.

I sighed, things had changed, I had Bonnie now. That itself was something I figured impossible- deciding I basically knew everyone in Forks already and none of them wanted to be my friends, but yet here I was. But this? It was nuts, crazy. The Cullen family didn't go for outsiders, and if they did it would not be me.

"I'm being serious, I have only ever seen him talk to his family and you without being forced to by school." Bonnie pushed further.

I rolled my eyes, even if my cheeks reddened at her commenting. "He's talked to you."

"Because of you." She pointed out.

"Doesn't matter." I knew I was being stubborn now, foolishly so, but could not help it. Now it was Bonnie's turn to roll her eyes, but she let the conversation fall, and she went back to watching the movie. I was left pondering her words and considering the possibility of what it would be like if they were true.

I saw the car before I heard the knock.

Considering the crutches I almost fell down the stairs in an attempt to get the door before my sister could. Of course this had to happen when the whole house was here, with my luck my sister would be talking about this nonstop for the next few weeks.

"I got it!" My mother called as she passed the stairs, catching sight of me trying to get down the stairs on my crutches and pausing to give me a funny look before continuing with an oblivious smile as she went to open the door to Jasper and Alice.

"Hello Mrs. Day my brother and I came to check up on how Helena is doing." I heard Alice's soft voice floating through the house. My throat tightened and I contemplated a fashion of getting down the stairs without looking like a fool. Behind me the sound of my sister's door opening only made me further groan.

"Is that who I think it is?" My sister whispered as she approached behind me, a mischievous glint to her eye. I frowned and moved to step in front of her, but she carefully darted around me. Turns out the person without the broken ankle has a bit of an advantage. I could hear her voice emerge as my mother welcomed Alice and Jasper into the house. "The cripple is coming down now."

I heard a bell like laugh as I struggled down the stairs and heard gentle steps as the view of Jasper came into view at the bottom of the stairs. The memory of Bonnie's declaration to me came to mind and I felt blood rush at my cheeks, looking down to feign attention to stepping down the stares to avoid him seeing it. He was just be polite, that was all. If anything it was because of Alice. Her wanting to be my friend was more realistic than Jasper being interested in me.

"Look who came to check in on you, Lena?" My mother said with a happy realization dawned on her features as she stood with Alice and Lu by her sides.

Jasper watched me, stepping closer as I made it to the end of the stares, a small warmth spreading in my chest as I saw him. So much for getting rid of that infatuation. "Hello, Helena." He said with that lovely Southern drawl.

"Jazz and I _really_ wanted to make sure you are feeling okay after the accident." Alice seemed to bounce in front of me with an elated glint to her eyes. She took me in an made a small frown wit her face. "You poor thing."

I tried to smile in thanks but could not help but glance back and forth, overwhelmed by everyone around me. My eyes ended up on Jasper, silently watching from behind Alice. "They said it should be almost nearly healed in two weeks." I told them. Jasper seemed to go from staring at me to down to my foot but with this seemed to ease back. "Thank you again for helping us that day." I said, glancing at my mother and sister standing in the background. They were loving this.

"It was my pleasure." Jasper said and it felt like I was floating.

Mom stepped forward looking almost overwhelmed with excitement. "Would you two like to stay a little while? Anything to drink?" She asked.

Alice turned around to my mother, leaving Jasper still staring at me. "That is very kind Mrs. Day but we actually were on our way to go pick up our brother, but I think I could speak for both of us when I say we'd love to in the future." A shine seemed cross over her eyes as her eyes just barely flickered back to Jasper.

I could almost see the disappointment in Lu's eyes but she hid it well, my mother just seemed satisfied that with the end of her comment. "Yes…" Jasper seemed to give an unreadable look to Alice. "It was really nice to see you feeling better." His voice was cordial, and almost restricted sounding.

"Thank you." My voice was in a whisper.

As soon as they had come in, they were leaving, the static energy that had filled my chest leaving with them. It seemed my family members felt the same, Lu pouting and my mother giving me curious looks at to why the Cullen family had taken such interest in me- as if I had any idea.  
"If I said I think they might be trying to draft me into a cult, would you believe me?" I whispered, leaning on my crutches at the bottom of the stairs.

Lu looked at me with gaping eyes before nodding. "Is it bad if I say yes?"

"Yes it is!" My mother's voice carried from the kitchen.

* * *

A/N- Small update, but its the Holidays so I'm a bit busy :) I hope everyone has a lovely end of the year and if you celebrate Christmas Merry Christmas


	6. Chapter 5

"If you're going to take a chance to play with fire, don't worry about getting burned. Worry about become an arsonist and setting fire to everything you've ever known." - Kat Savage

* * *

Chapter Five

The sound of waves crashing against the shore and the crisp air of a warm and fresh summer day fell and moved over Helena's body as she sprawled her body onto the towel below her and next to Bonnie by her side. Her sister and her friends were down near the water kicking and splashing water at each other. Boys were chasing after girls in crop tops and shorts and her own sister was eyeing a boy who Helena thought she could do better than, but it did not stop her.

Bonnie looked almost disappointed. "How are some girls so good with boys?" She said with a wistful expression to her brown doe eyes.

Helena frowned, her eyes flickering back and forth between the group of older boys and girls and then back to the two of them sitting by the tree line. "They like popular girls and anything new that walks in." Bonnie frowned at this seeming only further crestfallen by my statement. "Why would you want to date someone like that?"

"I don't know… what other option do we have? Not all of us can catch the attention of a Cullen," Helena rolled her eyes and glanced to Lu as to avoid accidentally letting on to the embarrassment on her features. "Is it so crazy to just want a boyfriend?" Bonnie giggled as if shameful.

Helena laughed along with her and the issue seemed settled, their elbows digging into the sand through our towels.

Her foot had healed, and she did not see the Cullen family again save for the Doctor after a few check ups. The days before their sophomore year were slowly growing thinner and much of anything had failed to happen. It should have been a relief after their first day of break ending with us almost spending a night in the forest and only gave rescue after I broke my ankle. But it wasn't, something felt boring and off. The comfort of her books and Bonnie's company was not enough.

"Who are your sister and her friends talking to?" Bonnie's question drew Helena from her thoughts and glancing to where her sister stood talking to a tan-skinned boy and some of his friends. It was reservation boys. It was hardly surprising, they were at La Push, but something of the way they blended into her sister and her friends seemed unusual.

Lu caught the two's eyes and begun waving them over. A few tan faces turned as they got up, exchanged cautious glances, they stumbled down to the shore. The boy Lu had been giving flirtatious stares was standing close to her side and giving weary eyes to one of the boys in particular. Lu spoke first, "Helena, we were just about to start up the bonfire and they were going to join us, can you and Bonnie go get the cooler from my car?"

Helena nodded and caught the keys when her sister tossed her to them, her sensed too on edge from the strange air of the situation to complain. Turning to Bonnie, she raised her eyebrows and the two started to the parking lot where her sister's faded blue Mercury sat by the an unfamiliar truck and a couple of the other kid's cars that had packed the Forks kids in for the journey.

"Your sister was acting weird." Bonnie said, walking to the opposite door of Helena and opening it to retrieve the cooler with drinks and hotdogs to cook over the fire.

Helena nodded and glanced over her shoulder. "I think she likes that boy." She figured she did not have to distinguish which one it was. After another moment of thought she continued. "And I think she is trying to make him jealous, inviting the La Push boys."

"This sort of thing isn't uncommon." Bonnie tried to defend, but with a sigh Helena realized though it was hardly a rare event for some Forks kids to interact with some of the locals when venturing to the beach, that her sister was definitely plotting. "So then why did she send us off?"

Snapping her head in her direction, Helena realized she had been a bit too caught up considering her sister and the boy that she hadn't thought too much about it. "I don't know." She said with her eyebrows furrowed. "Let's just get this stuff over."

The two of them held the opposite sides of the cooler and carried it down to the beach, seeing the pile of firewood some of the boys had assembled earlier beginning to have the start of a fire as flames itched their way into the air above. Around the fire was the others, and in their hands unmarked bottles. A terrible emotion washed from Helena's head to her toes, leaving them feeling cold and her lips painted into a frown as she realized why her sister had sent the two of them away.

A deep frown set in her features, she pulled Bonnie a bit quicker to place the cooler in the sand besides them before standing in front of her sister, not bothering to care that it blocked her out for giving side winks to the boy she had been flirting with all day.

With crossed arms Helena spoke, "Bonnie and I are going to wait in you car whenever you are ready to go home, or I can just call Mom." She tried to say it as calm and neutral as possible, but the looming threat stood. Lu's smile faded and she put the covered bottle into the sand besides her and stood up.

"Seriously?" Lu asked, her voice hushed as to not draw any further attention from the eyes around them. When Helena did not back down, not even with her taller sister standing with her hands on her hips in front of her and a confused Bonnie questioning the two of them behind her, Lu sighed and grabbed her forearm. "Come on," she said annoyed as she towed her sister up the beach with Bonnie trudging along behind them.

When they reached her car she realized Helena. "Why are you doing this Helena?" Lu accused of her.

"Why are you guys drinking? Did you think sending us to get the cooler so you guys could set up would make us oblivious?" Helena accused right back, Bonnie slowly growing into realization besides her.

Lu groaned and stomped one of her foot. "It isn't a big deal, don't get all self-righteous on me, alright?" Helena's anger fell a bit; she really was more disappointed than angry, though in her naivety did not understand why her sister was being so foolish. It was one to do it behind locked doors, but out in the open? It seemed stupid to her. She never got that sort of thing to begin with. The stuff was poison. "I'm just trying to impress Tyler okay? Please don't tell Mom."

"Then drive us home." Helena said, glancing to Bonnie, as if afraid to speak for her.

"I don't mind waiting." Bonnie added with a small shrug and her usual passive tone.

Helena looked back to her sister and sighed. "How about you drop us off halfway at the gift-shop and I have mom pick us up from there?"

"She'll get mad at me." Lu said.

"I'll tell her I went hiking with Bonnie and we didn't want to walk back or make you leave early." It still might annoy their mother, but it would be better than having to stick it out while Lu and her friends drank and Helena and Bonnie tried to entertain themselves while pretending it wasn't happening.

Lu nodded in compliance and finally took her keys in between her fingers and gestured to her car "Alright, deal."

* * *

The ticking of the clock… the sight of the hourglass on her table as she waited away the time left for their study session… Helena could not focus. She felt ready to groan or scream and kick, maybe even throw the Math book against the wall. The time for summer was fading and the summer work left buried on her table suddenly was unable to be ignored. English was easy, History as well, those the more enjoyable of the work. The math work though… well it left Helena ready to tear at her hair. She did not understand the point of it anyway. Weren't they supposed to be on a break?

"I can't do this anymore." Helena finally blurted out, discarding the sand still left at the top section of the hourglass that was telling her she _should_ be doing more. She almost surprised herself; she loved schoolwork and was usually quite good at it. Sure she enjoyed her break and now she had Bonnie to help pass time, but what had happened to make her so reluctant and distractible?

Bonnie sighed but put her pencil down and nodded, rubbing at her hairline and running fingers through her dark hair. "Can we take a break?" She asked and Helena nodded almost immediately. After a moment of silence where Bonnie seemed to want to say something, she finally spoke. "You know that day at La Push?"

Helena blinked and took a moment to think before remembering, it was the day her sister and her got into their fight of some dumb case of underage drinking. Their mom had luckily not considered the situation too much, only mumbling a few complaints and reminding her hiking was how she broke her ankle not too long ago. Neither had gotten in trouble though- so she was unsure why Bonnie was bringing it up now. "Yeah I remember," she said quietly.

"Do you ever wonder why they have such an easy time? Drinking and all that." She asked and Helena frowned.

"I think it is different from person to person, but there is nothing wrong with not wanting to." Helena figured her friend was having a bit of self-doubt and was trying to calm her suspicions but by the lack of comfort on Bonnie's face she realized it might not be the case. "I just wonder sometimes if we are missing out, not on drinking really- just other stuff."

Helena spoke without even thinking. "I do too." That longing ache filled her chest as it always did when thoughts strayed too distant from her control. It felt like what the books could not fill, the desire for more, something physical that she could touch and see with her own hands and her own eyes.

Bonnie let out a breath as if relieved she was not alone. "I want an adventure, you know? Something fun to look back on, a bit daring, it doesn't even have to be illegal."

"Like what?' Helena asked. There was hope in her chest now; did Bonnie have something in mind? Would that change things? Would then her life be more than the average boring and dreary Fork day spent living in her fantasy worlds?

"There is this club in Port Angeles that has a teen night, I hear some girls talking about it last year. It could be fun, one last night out before school starts up again." Helena could not help but smile at this prospect, and Bonnie fed off of it, continuing. "I could ask my parents to borrow their car for the night, we wouldn't be allowed out too late but still."

As Bonnie finished, breathless and her textbook squeezed in her fingers, Helena was left with a big lopsided grin on her face. She nodded; it would be fun, get some fresh air and expose herself to some new experiences, right?

* * *

The street was passing by in a blur, too quickly. Too fast.

Not that Bonnie's driving was bad, really she was quite good for her experience, and cautious enough to avoid speeding. Yet Helena felt she might as well be going a hundred. It was the night for their big adventure and she felt like her heart might as well be trying to break out from her ribs. She was impeccably nervous to a pathetic point. Maybe her lack of social reaction hadn't _all_ been interested in simple disinterested after all.

None of that would do her any good now, the people who swarmed the brick building with the loud music did not care if she was in advanced classes or that she preferred the speech of the eloquent characters of her books and the mystic of fairytales over their rambles. If they knew that they would just ignore her, not care enough to even give her a second glance let alone try to adjust themselves according to her desires.

As Bonnie parked and almost leaped from the car, Helena realized that her friend was in a much different mental state than herself. Taking a deep breath, she unbuckled her seat belt and stepped onto the asphalt. The sound of bass seemed to vibrate the ground around them and the laughter and conversation of others mulling around the building filled the usual silence of the night.

With Bonnie by her side, she braved the entrance, and soon emerged into the musk of the indoor. The dance floor was dark, as if to hide the movement and actions of its inhabitants, and the DJ booth and the tables surrounding lit in blue and pink lights that fell into and contrasted with each other. Helena considered it a pretty sight, but was too preoccupied with her unease to take a full appreciation.

"What do we do now?" Helena nearly had to shout into Bonnie ear as they looked into the crowd.

Bonnie flashed her a wide smile, "Dance I guess." Helena's eyes widened but allowed her friend to drag her into the darkness and madness of the center of the room. Almost immediately sweaty bodies were pressing up against her and shoving past her, not in consideration of her whether it be bad or good but rather ultimate lack of acknowledgement as they moved and pushed against each other. Helena wondered how anyone could ever enjoy this. Bonnie seemed to be trying to figure it out, and Helena realized a boy was looking at her and almost wanted to shield her away from her glance with her body before she realized this was probably what her friend wanted.

It was not what she wanted. She did not even know what she wanted.

Swaying slowly as bodies pushed and shoved against her, she saw the figure against the wall. If it was anyone else she would not notice him, no one would with the way he painted himself to the wall. But even with that terrible pain that seemed to have found its way onto his features she could not miss him, apparently neither could a few other girls.

Jasper Hale was standing against the side of the wall staring at her.

Any movement Helena had been making before left her limbs as she allowed herself to be pushed and shoved by the bodies around her, she could only stare back. The music sounded like only the rhythm in her ear, the light shining on his scrunched up features like he wasn't breathing. He kept looking at her, even when it was painfully clear both were quite cognizant of the other's stare.

Helena stared, and wondered how in the world Jasper happened to be in the same place at the same time to find himself standing against the wall staring at her, ignoring the attempts of bright eyed girls fawning over him near him and glancing at him as if trying to catch his eye- he did not look over once. It was complimenting, in a way, but it also terrified her- leaving her heart frozen, as she seemed to constrain her breathing. She wanted to go over to him, to ask why he was here and why he seemed to be in so much pain and yet still was standing here painted against the wall.

The sound of Bonnie's giggling and knocking into her was the only thing that stopped her from starting towards Jasper. Her trance was broken and she took a moment to come back down to reality, it felt like she had been floating or in some alternate dimension for those moments she spent staring at the boy on the wall. Bonnie was trying to talk to her. Helena had to lean down so she could speak directly into her ear for her to hear her.

"I'm going to dance with that boy." She said with a smile on her face that made Helena wonder if she had been drinking before they met up. Before Helena could respond, most likely to tell her to not go up to the stranger or to at least be careful, Bonnie was bouncing away and disappeared into the crowd. Helena was left standing alone in the sea of bodies, the only one still in the violent crashing of limbs. She was almost insulted, but when she remembered Jasper, she took it as an opportunity.

Turning back to where he had been, she had to take another glance after finding her vacant. She assumed she must have guessed where he had been wrong but after a couple more seconds of inspections, while fighting to not be swallowed by the crowd, she realized the empty spot of wall must have been where he had been standing. Now he was not.

Shoving her way through the crowd she nearly knocked them all out of the way to escape from the suffocation of the crowd. Desperation set in, a primal sort she did not understand, and as she glanced every direction she could crane her neck in to find him. Finally her eyes set on the circle of girls who had been giggling in his direction.

Stomping over to them, her eyes most certainly wild, she entered their group. They stared at her in confusion, a few as if disgusted she had dared interrupt, but she spoke regardless. "Did any of you see where the blond boy just went, the handsome one?" She felt that was enough of a description.

From the recognition that flashed in their eyes, it apparently was, but their eyes quickly drew guarded. One girl with pin-straight hair and a tight dress narrowed her eyes at Helena. "Why are you asking?"

"I'm looking for him." Helena continued, refusing to be scared by the girls attempt at intimidating her into leaving. She was not sure what came over her, but allowed it to wash over her, to overtake her as she searched for Jasper. It was like her body just needed to see him again.

One of the other girls scoffed and gave her a one over, "I don't think you'll be his type sweetie."  
Helena's head seemed to burn and a fire lit in her chest as she pursued her lips. "He's my boyfriend, now tell me where he went."

The girl seemed taken back, and frankly so was Helena. She had no idea what had come over her, why she felt protective or desperate enough to prove herself and get the information that she had to make up the lie. She almost felt pitiful, but maintained a poker face; the girl seemed to believe it- though hesitant. Why would she lie after all?

Helena didn't know.

"He went out that door." The girl finally resolved into saying, pointing in the direction of a side door along the wall. The pressure in Helena's chest seemed to release as she discarded the girls to move towards the door, ignoring their incredulous stares as she walked away.

Pushing the door open, the fresh air of the Washington mountainside and the suburbia that framed the edges of it seemed to hit her with a near violent breeze as she threw herself into the night. Turning on her heel she glanced every direction for Jasper only to find one unfamiliar boy in dark clothes only lit by the cigarette between his fingers.

Helena's face crinkled and she sighed in disappointment. Had the girls been lying to her or had Jasper actually come out here and just had already left? Either way, it meant the fire that swelled in her heart from the intensity of his stare quickly was squandered by the cold air of the night. She held her arm around her bare shoulders, regretting not bringing a coat, and feeling foolish and regretting her choice of describing her relation to Jasper when talking to the girls.

"Hey," Helena glanced to her side, to the boy with the cigarette hanging from her lips and redlined eyes. He was looking at her now, no longer distracted by his smoke. There was something that felt on edge about him, sharp and unpredictable as a knife.

"Hello," Helena whispered, realizing that she was now alone with him and she felt confident in the belief he might have more in his system then just some nicotine. She started towards the door, to enter back into the heat of the indoor and the safety in numbers, ready to give up on her attempt to find the disappearing Jasper.

"Wait! Don't leave." The boy was behind her, his hand on her shoulder. Helena turned around to him; he did not seem so immediate a threat, yet still there was something unnerving in his eyes.

"I have to get back to my friends!" Helena insisted.

This only made the boy seem more desperate. "Come on, give me some company, do you smoke?"

"No, she doesn't" Helena and the druggie turned to the figure that had approached behind them.

Jasper stood with darkened eyes, his face lit half in darkness and half in the fluorescence of the light outside the club, with his hand in his pockets and his eyes with a tense aggression to them- staring at the boy behind Helena. She could feel his hand drop from her shoulders and hear the step he took backwards from her.

"This your boyfriend?" The boy was talking to her now, but Helena no longer felt frightened. She looked back at him and opened her mouth to speak but was unsure what to say.

She was going to settle on, "No but please leave me alone" when Jasper filled the silence. "Yes now, please take your drugs elsewhere." Helena was staring at him as he left- did Jasper know something she didn't? It was like he was staring at him and could just smell the ill intent and sense the hidden secrets shoved away into his pockets.

He held up his hands and back away, moving around the corner and leaving Helena alone with the figure besides her. A breeze blew over her and she trembled. Almost immediately Jasper was taking his jacket off, the black leather soon surrounding her shoulders. Glancing backwards to him she was too stunned by all the actions that had led up to the chivalrous action that she could only mumble a thank you before going back to staring at him.

"Thank you," she said again, this time more certain and this time because of his scaring off the boy. Helena turned around to face him, holding the jacket closer across her even though she was warm enough without doing so. She wanted the scent of him closer to her. Her cheeks reddened at the thought and hoped that he figured it was just from the brisk air against her exposed skin.

Jasper nodded, his eyes softened into their usual pools of gold as he seemed to analyze her, stepping back to get a better look as if making sure she had not be injured anywhere. She nearly laughed at the ridiculousness of the action, one because she had only had an unnerving conversation not a run in with a pack of mobsters and two because Jasper was not supposed to care so much.

He couldn't care so much even if the times he was around it sure seemed like it, because obviously he was not around often for good reason. Surely if he cared, which he didn't, he wouldn't be so flaky in his appearances.

"Are you okay?" Jasper asked, his accent thicker than usual, Helena enjoyed the thought that it must be because he was emotional.

She nodded, her heart still racing but now for a different reason. She couldn't care much for the boy that had gotten to close anymore, now she was with Jasper and back in all the intensity he seemed to bring with him- wrapped up in his leather jacket.

"Did he bother you?" Jasper asked again, as if trying to keep her talking, and he seemed on edge. Though why he seemed so deeply so she didn't understand.

Helena shook her head, and forced herself to speak. "No I'm fine, seems you've saved the day again." She said trying to lighten the mood, remembering the day months ago when he had come rescued her stuck in the mood. This time her ankle wasn't broken and she wasn't covered in mud.

"It has been quite the coincidences." Jasper responded, though his face still hardening each time he directed his glance behind her to where the boy had turned around the corner.

But as he said it, she suddenly got the idea that maybe it wasn't. She nodded anyway and took a deep breath. "Thank you again."

"It's my pleasure." All southern charm, all good looks. She remembered that he had called her his girlfriend. As if reading his mind he said, "I apologize if it seemed like I was overstepping back then, I wanted to make sure he left you alone." Helena smiled, "It's okay, I don't mind." She nearly turned into a tomato when she said the last bit, but Jasper just smiled at her with that lovely grin as she remembered she had done the exact same thing only ten minutes ago.

"Do you want to stay?" Jasper asked, gesturing to the door besides them. Helena looked at it and frowned.

"No not really, but I probably should find Bonnie…"

Jasper sighed, as if frustrated. "I'm going to stay here, wait to make sure you two get home safe." Helena gave him a small smile; something that felt like tickling in her chest emerged with Jasper's words. It was sweet, like the southern drawl that was like honey laced on his voice and she was the girl with the sweet tooth. She would leap into a pool of Jasper's essence- even if that seemed crazy. Something about him was like that, she realized as her eyes flickered from the pavement by their feet and his lovely gold eyes that he was more. He was more than the warmth of a sunny day or the sweetness of strawberry shortcake or even the pull that all of her books and fairytales gave her.

As she stared at him with eyes of awe, she figured he was her real life fairytale, and she was ready to leap into him if he would let her.

* * *

A/N- I've been a bit busy with travel but managed to get this long chapter out, and boy have we gotten to a bit of a changing point. Without giving anything away I want to reassure if anyone is having doubts that though Helena is all happy now that she is going to be getting a rude awakening very soon.

Side note, thank you so much to everyone who added this story to their favorites and follows and especially to those who reviewed. It really helps me get these out, very encouraging! Thank you again! Though I must say I am confused a bit by one guest review, thank you Debbie Hicks but it looks like you might've included a chapter excerpt? Not sure if that was on purpose or not XD


	7. Chapter 6

A/N- Guys... I'm embarrassed... one because this is late and too short but because I also realized this and the previous chapter are in third while the rest of the story is in first? I have no idea how this evaded my notice, but I need to fix it.

Upon looking it over though I realized I was unsure whether fixing it means going all to 1st or all to third... if anyone wants to leave their opinion in a review I would really appreciate it!

* * *

Where the last chapter left off: Helena is with Bonnie at a teen club and after trying to get some fresh air after being separated from Bonnie and seeing Jasper there alone, a guy harasses her after she refuses to smoke a cigarette with him, which is when Jasper swoops in and they talk outside.

* * *

Chapter Six

"Where do you want to go?' Helena jerked her head to stare at Jasper, to take in his darkened features and take in what he was saying.

"Uh…" she started, a foolish grin slipping onto her face, she was feeling almost light-headed from the way his essence seemed to be encompassing her, the scent from his jacket was drifting along her head and thoughts. It was something old and sweet, a mixture of leather and mint with maybe a hint of lemon like the candles she had at home. "What do you mean?" The pause was excessive, and caused her to blush knowing the entire time she had taken to speak she was staring off into space with that dumb smile.

Jasper gave a light grin; "I doubt you want to just wait out here for Bonnie, how about I take you for coffee? I don't like these sort of places anyway."

Helena wanted to ask him why he was there then, and why he was alone, or maybe voice her fears of Bonnie being unable to find her, but Jasper seemed to be suffocating her thoughts and her better reasoning was suffering because of it. She barely managed to voice the little she did say, "I should make sure Bonnie knows I'm safe and not to worry."

"Of course," Jasper said, ever the gentlemen, and nodded towards her phone. Helena pulled her phone out and sent a quick text to Bonnie telling her a quick summary of what happened, though it sounded hard to believe, and to text her whenever she is ready to leave. When it delivered she tucked the phone back into her pocket to look back to Jasper. "Ready?" He asked and she nodded, following him with his jacket still wrapped around her chest. She was wondering what his car looked like, or if he drove the one his family usually came to school in.

"I hope you don't mind…" Jasper moved around a car to pause, giving a charming but almost fearful smile. "I drive a motorcycle." Helena blinked, the vehicle in front of her was as sleek as the other Cullen car and though she did not know much about motorcycles she could assume it was expensive, but this was no car. She had never been on a motorcycle before, let alone with a boy she barely knew.

The picture of some fantasy dreaming, where Helena has her gentleman "bad boy", and the reality that Helena was scared mixed and swirled, leaving her frozen. Jasper seemed to recognize her apprehension almost immediately comforted her. "You don't have to, there is no pressure." Maybe it was the smooth and genuine nature to his words, that though there was a bit of that confident and powerful essence to him he was still the guy that would give her his jacket and not force her into anything. Maybe it was just foolishness, but Helena trusted him. Possibly more than she should.

She shook her head to dismiss Jasper's invitation to back out and walked up to the bike, to prove she was not bluffing. Jasper gave her a wicked sort of smirk; he seemed satisfied by her decision. Helena added this to the list of things she knew about him. He was a southern gentleman, intelligent and reserved, but he also apparently enjoyed motorcycles. He was confident and almost had a tinge of darkness to the sweetness that lined the most of him.

Most confusing of all, he somehow seemed glad to be in her presence.

With clammy hands that she concealed and tried to dry in the process, Helena watched Jasper take a helmet out and hand it her way, she glanced questioningly for a moment before putting it on. The way he looked at her said it all- she would be wearing the helmet, that was not up for debate. Climbing on to the motorcycle on starting the engine, Jasper turned to her one last time, it was the moment where all talk and courage had to either act up or shut up.

Helena would not have believed a year ago she would get on that motorcycle- but she was not that person anymore, people grow and evolve. So swallowing away her fear, Helena climbed onto the back and threw her one leg over and around the around Jasper.

There was closeness to their situation, an intimacy, that created a whole new flood of emotions and blushing- but Helena contained herself in silence. "You're going to have to hold on, darling." Jasper said.

She nodded even though he couldn't see her and slowly her cautious hands slithered and wrapped themselves around Jasper's center. Gently as if she was afraid of squeezing him too hard, "I won't break." He told her, a soft tone to his voice that made her do as he suggested and grip a bit tighter instead of feel embarrassed like she might have with others.

And then, though Jasper had gone so slow, the moment the motorcycle begun moving out of the parking lot and turning onto the mountain rode, Helena felt her heart racing. Instinctively she folded her head into Jasper, her fear overriding her pride, and tried to comfort herself in the sort of things she usually kept locked away.

Like he nice he smelt, or how pale his skin really was, or even how cold he was. She realized that last one with her arms wrapped around him, but it didn't bother her, from the club to her anxiety she felt fairly overheated.

As they continued driving something shifted within Helena. The fear become apprehension and slowly as she got brave enough to look around and take in the sight of the forest flashing by them, an energy and liveliness filled her bones. Almost like a giddiness that made her want to laugh or scream just for the sake of filling the silence and knowing she could. It was exhilarating.

When Jasper turned into a small diner parking lot, she was almost disappointed it was over. Head still dizzy from the rush, Helena stumbled to take off the helmet and hand it back to Jasper, who naturally was far more graceful than her. With a quick smile and gentle brush of his fingers on Helena's back to guide her in the direction of the diner, she felt like she was dreaming.

The night took a happy turn, she thought, and then hoped that Bonnie was having a similar experience. Entering the diner with a happy mind thinking of both Jasper and the peculiarly lovely situation she had found herself in along with the thought of retelling it all to Bonnie, it was not until she met the eyes of the waitress did her high collapse.

And oh did it crumble.

The woman was more a girl; she appeared a year or two older than her and written on her face with an unfriendly sneer was everyone of her doubts and insecurities that lingered in the back of her mind when she was around of thinking about Jasper.

Like Helena didn't deserve him. Like she had no idea why such a charming and handsome man would be seen with her. It took every will she had to not break down and make her sudden despair noticeable on her face.

The waitress lead them, smiling to Jasper and ignoring Helena, and by some strange sight it almost seemed as they were sitting down that Jasper was frowning as the girl. But the action was quick and was almost immediately replaced by a sudden warm feeling that crept in her stomach and brought a nearly unwilling smile to her face.

"What do you want? It's on me." Jasper drawled and Helena once again was forcing herself from her own mind, though now feeling at least a bit better from the nasty face the waitress had given her.

Helena smiled and glanced at the menu in front of her. "You don't have to do that." She told him.

"I want to." Jasper said.

Helena's heart skipped a beat. "I guess just a coffee for me, what are you going to get."

Jasper paused. "I'm actually not going to get anything- if you don't mind." Helena quickly shook her head. "Good so it'll give me much more time to ask you too many questions."  
"But how will I answer them if I'm drinking coffee?" Helena asked with feigned ignorance.

She was graced with a pearly white smile. "I'll have to make them complicated enough that they tell me a lot but can still be answered with a yes or no." Jasper was talking a lot, she noticed, not in a bad way of course. She just had little seen him so active and lively. She liked it.

Well Helena liked it when he was quiet too, both had their charms and if she was being honest she just really liked him. It felt stupid and childish but she could not help herself. He was the gentleman, sweet-talking her while having that right amount of edge to lure her in.

Sitting there talking to him, Helena realized she didn't really care what that waitress or anyone thought about her. It didn't matter if they deemed her worthy of Jasper's attention or not- the only one whose opinion on that mattered was Jasper himself.

So she kept smiling and thinking how lovely everything was, and even dared to consider Jasper perfect.

How wrong she was.

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A/N- I'm currently treading on my walk of shame posting this, it has been so long and this is to short and I wish it hasn't/wasn't but it has/is. For a while I had just moved away from fan fiction- to try and focus on my original work- but I find this such a fun creative outlet and have had some free time.

I'm also graduating soon, so this summer I want to write, write, and write! This included!


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